Saturday, October 12, 2013

I Wish You The Worst (The Breakup Stages)


So, my friend is going through a breakup from her boyfriend of two years. Since this has happened she has been going through, what I call, stages of grief. Each day of the week she calls me she is a different stage, and sometimes she goes through all the stages in one day. I say this because sometimes when we talk she hates him, sometimes she's crying and misses him, and sometimes she's happy he's gone. It's really hard to keep up with, so I just conform to the mood of the day. It usually involves me saying things like; "yeah girl you didn't deserve that!" or "maybe you guys will get back together you never know" of course this depends on the stage she's in at the time. I'm not normally thinking when I say these things it's just that when you hear the same thing for 13 days in a row it's kind of hard to come up with new and fresh things to say, so you just give up and come up with stock responses you can say without much thought. These stages are pretty standard across the board, but everyone may not express them the same:

Denial - you really don't believe you're broken up, he'll be back in a few days after he cools down, he always does! So you sit back, kick your feet up and channel surf waiting for your phone to ring.

Hurt - it's been three days and no calls, texts, emails, or Facebook likes; you realize this thing is really over; he really isn't coming back; what did you do to deserve this? your life is officially over *endless stream of tears*

Reconciliation - you think, well maybe if I just call him and talk to him we can work this thing out.. yeah that's it.. *calls... ignores your call... you cry*

Anger - the same stuff as Hurt, but with an "who the f*** does he think he is, he wasn't sh** anyway!" tone.

Acceptance - you realize that it's over and that there is a possibility that you will find love again... right after you cut his face out of all your pictures...

Unfortunately, just because you've reached the last stage doesn't mean life's all rainbows and glitter, it is possible that you can and will regress to the beginning stages. You will more than likely repeat this process several times until you are able to resume a somewhat normal life.

During one of the angry stage conversations my friend says, "you know what? I'm sick of people saying 'I wish you the best' to someone when they break up with them. I don't wish him the best, f&@% him, I wish him the worst. I hope he catches a disease or his d$@% falls off!" I agreed and also wished him the same. I knew how to play my part. I just held the phone, listened, and commented when appropriate. Truthfully though, who really wants to see their ex happy with someone else after a recent breakup? Or happy at all for that matter? No one I've ever known.

It's okay though, I sit for however many days it takes and listen, because she has been there for me and will be there I'm sure, if/when I ever go through "the stages" again. After all, what are friends for if not to join you in wishing your ex the worst?

P.S. My friend is crazy and curses like a sailor. I'm sorry.

Monday, September 16, 2013

Rackets Aren't Just For Tennis

So I learned today that rackets are NOT just for tennis.. (see below convo I had with my mom Saturday and learn something too)

Her: You know that I went to pay my insurance yesterday and they were closed early?! *infuriated* I hope they don't have any rackets going on over there..

Me: Any what? 

Her: Any rackets.. 

Me: ...

Her: You know rackets! *she is now yelling it at me, as if the pitch of her voice and her repeating the word will unlock the definition database in my brain* 

Me: Are you sure you're using the right word mom? *also meaning I think you're crazy and you don't know what you're talking about* 

Her: Yes it's when businesses do illegal scams. It's on the news all the time you can ask your grandmother! *because apparently she's the rackets aficionado* 

Me: umm all I know about about rackets is that people use them to play tennis..

Her: Yes I know that-  Oh my god what if they've run off with all the money I've paid them and I really don't have insurance! *panic sets in*

Me: Mom they probably just closed early for the LSU game or something please calm down. 

Her: Oh yeah you're probably right. *panic subsided*

From this point on I continued to tease her with various jokes using the word racket in them... I won't bore you with the details. 

However, the joke was on me. I decided to do my racket research and googled the definition, and this is what I found courtesy of Dictionary.com: 

racket1
— noun
  1. loud noise or clamor, especially of adisturbing or confusing kind; din;uproar: The traffic made terribleracket in the street below.
  2. social excitement, gaiety, ordissipation.
  3. an organized illegal activity, such as bootlegging or the extortion of money from legitimate businesspeople by threat or violence.
  4. dishonest scheme, trick, business,activity, etc.: the latest weight-reducing racket.
  5. Usually, the rackets. organized illegalactivities: Some say that the revenuefrom legalized gambling supports therackets.
Who knew?! Well my mom did obviously.. I had to call her and apologize to her for being such a pretentious know-it-all and teasing her in the car.. Of course she had already forgotten about it and had to try and remember what I was talking about. Which made the whole thing seem anti-climactic and made me feel like I wasted my time even looking it up. *sigh* 

So to everyone reading that didn't know that an organized illegal activity was also called racket, you're welcome. To those of you that knew that, well congrats on being the smartest freaking person in the world.  

Until Next time! 


Thursday, September 12, 2013

5 Annoying Things I Saw On Instagram Today

I left work today super excited about coming home and working on this blog post. I had a specific subject that I wanted to write about and everything. When I got home I made dinner, which was just boxed Jambalaya nothing fancy, ate, and showered. Then I was ready! *rubs hands together and sits down at laptop*. Then all of a sudden... it happened...


My brain was drained by a thought draining nymph of all the thoughts I had about my post. All I could do was sit and stare at my computer screen and hope that the words would magically appear. Since I nor my laptop felt like being magical today, I decided I’d check the barrage of social networks I’m on for something thought provoking. First stop, Instagram. I scroll through about an hour worth of posts, then close out of it because my attention span is that of a gnat, and I was starting to get annoyed by some of the things I saw.  I decided to share some of those things with you because, well, I couldn't think of my original idea and I was dead set on making a post today. 

5 Annoying Things That I Saw On Instagram Today

1.    When someone types ‘congrads’ or ‘congradulations’. I just want to type under them “It’s congratttttttulations geez!” Like I literally have to scroll past the post to keep from commenting. There is nor has there ever been a ‘d’ in that word. I’m willing to bet that they got a D in English though.

2.    When people post pictures of their feet. I just shivered when I typed that. Feet give me the creeps, always have. It seems to be the people who have the most unfavorable looking toes that like to post their pictures of their weekly pedicure and new polish. Please just spare us and show us your nails (on your hands) or post the polish bottle.. something.. anything.. for the love of God.

3.   People who post pictures that are of an object or a person other than themselves, and they put no caption under them. I’m like really what the hell is this?? Am I supposed to guess? I don’t like this game very much. How am I supposed to know that it was the Frisbee your mom got you for your 5th birthday, or that it’s your baby brother in 1982? C’mon people let us know something!

4.   This new shorthand language that teenagers are using these days, if you can even call it that. It really makes me feel like our future is doomed. Why in the hell would you want to add more letters to a word? Me=Meh, My=Mii ,You=Yuh. Or something… idk.. I’m getting a headache now I’m gonna stop thinking about this.

5.   Someone who has apparently been wronged by society, or their boyfriend and they have to post 16 "you're gonna miss me when i'm gone because that whore will never be better than me" post. Ok.. we get it.. he's a horrible person that deserves to die... but would you mind sending these to HIS phone instead of subjecting us to the endless tirade that is your feelings? I've got Frisbees and anonymous baby pics to see on my timeline!



I could truly come up with tons more annoying things I see but really I have lost interest in doing so. So i'll end it before I get sidetracked and this becomes unfinished post #14 in my drafts. Plus I just started watching a really gross looking vampire movie so....


Until next time!

Thursday, July 25, 2013

The Perfection Procrastination Paradox

So, apparently my hopes and dreams of writing and keeping up a consistent blog is a bit harder to do than I imagined. It's not like I haven't run a blog before, I know how to do this. I told myself: "Self, all you have to do is think about what you want to write, and write it."  Well, that is not working out, mainly because, according to my therapist I have an issue with perfection (which must only apply to my writing), and second I don't do very well with managing my time.

I have about thirteen blog post I have actually started but never finished because it just didn't look right or I couldn't get it written out the way I wanted. When that happens I stare at the computer, get frustrated and go into a baby tantrum, and just close everything out and go brain dead (which apparently is a Sagittarius trait). That normally leads to watching one of the thirty shows I have saved on my DVR to catch up on. Sometime in between fast forwarding commercials and mindlessly scanning Facebook I happen to look up at the clock and see that it's three hours later and I've got nothing done, which leads to my next problem.. time management.

Dividing myself between work, a business, writing a novel and taking care of family and sometimes myself, I can barely remember the word blog. Those things are not an excuse though. I actually set aside time to write or at least work on my blog even if it's just thirty minutes, but somehow it always ends up not happening. Or it does happen, but never gets finished (see above paragraph). It's a vicious cycle you see...

Maybe I'm stressing myself out or putting unrealistic expectations on myself, who knows. Maybe I should just wait until I get the urge to write and just let it flow naturally. Maybe I have ADD. I don't know, but I've got to do something. I love writing, I have got to write. I have to get these thoughts out of my head before I spontaneously combust. Yeah I know that makes no sense but that's the way I'm feeling right now.

So, I'm enlisting your help.  If anybody has any tips on the "cure" for procrastination, writers block, perfection anxiety(I just made that one up), please let me know. I'm taking any and all suggestions!

Has this or something similar happened you? Leave a comment and tell me what you did to change it. Please I'm begging you!

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Allow Me To Introduce Myself

I'm not going to lie, I'm not starting this blog for myself (well not only myself), or as a personal journal (I have a physical journal for that). I started this blog because I want people to read it and hopefully take something from it. Whether it's a "oh, i didn't know that" or "i'm never coming back here again". Even if you learn what NOT to do on your own blog.. hey i'll take that too. As long as my time spent blogging was not in vain. Hopefully i'll also find some cool new blogs in the process as well. Whatever happens, if you're reading this i'm glad you stopped by and hope you follow and come back to visit me!

I wanted to figure out a way where I can let you know a little about me without boring you to death, things other than what you can read in my blog bio. The bright idea I came up with was a list and decided to call it: 10 Things About Me You Won't Read In My Bio (took me all night to come up with that name I swear!)...anyways.. here it goes...

10 Things About Me You Won't Read In My Bio

1. I hate wearing shoes, if I could wear flip flops year round I would. Even though where I live I almost can seeing as we probably have 2 weeks of actual "winter" weather a year.
2. I dislike when people ask obvious questions like when your coworker asks "Oh you're here today?" when they pass by your desk and see you sitting there.. like really? Nah i'm not here this is just a hologram..
3. My favorite TV show right now is Psych. Gus and Shawn are like my best friends in my head. Gonna be so sad to see the season end next week :(
4. I hate waiting on someone to do things for me. If I can do it myself I will. If I don't know how to do it, I'll learn.
5. I am a Sagittarius
6. My favorite color is Purple.
7. I can't deal with misspelled words in email or text messages. There is just no excuse for this, those squiggly red lines underneath the word aren't there for decoration!
8. I love the word "whatnot" and i'm not sure why...
9. If I said half the things that were in my head I would probably lose a few friends and possibly be put on an  FBI watch list (don't ask)..
10. I think that most people genuinely want to be good people. A lot of people allow their circumstances and past situations to change who they are.

Well.. I hope you didn't nod off too many times during this post. Hope you feel like you know me a little bit better. Please feel free to leave comments!

Ttyl!
Mimi :)

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Under Construction

Hi thanks for stopping by! This blog is currently under construction please visit again this weekend for my first post!

Ty!
Mimi :)